Ok, let’s talk enemies to lovers vs. friends to lovers. Which do you prefer?
Alright, let’s get one thing straight—I am an enemies-to-lovers kind of person. I know, I know, no one asked, but I’m telling you anyway because this is my article.
There’s just something about the intensity, the drama, the pure, unfiltered hatred that makes my heart do a little jig. But today, we’re being fair and looking at both sides of the trope battlefield: Enemies to Lovers vs. Friends to Lovers.
Yes, we’re comparing these tropes because I love a little structure in my chaos.
Friends to Lovers: The Slow Burn That Tests Your Patience
Ah, Friends to Lovers, the human equivalent of watching water boil. You sit there, watching these two people who have known each other their entire lives—sharing secrets, inside jokes, and tears.
I mean, they’ve literally been there for the ugly cry over that first heartbreak, only for them to remain painfully oblivious to the fact that they are, in fact, perfect for each other.
We see the longing glances, soft smiles, and casual touches that make their hearts race (but not enough for them to actually do something about it).
Meanwhile, the entire world—friends, family, the nosy neighbor down the street knows they should be together. But do they? Of course not.
We have to suffer through years of will they/won’t they nonsense before one of them finally wakes up and realizes, “Oh wow, I’m in love with my best friend.” Groundbreaking!
And yet… it’s kind of beautiful, isn’t it? The way they know each other better than anyone else, the years of quiet devotion, the trust that was built brick by brick. It’s frustrating, sure, but when it finally pays off? Chef’s kiss.
Enemies to Lovers: Where Romance Feels Like War
Now, let’s talk about the absolute unhinged chaos that is Enemies to Lovers. If Friends to Lovers is a slow-burning candle, this Enemies to Lovers is a freaking wildfire.
There’s just something about two people who genuinely, wholeheartedly hate each other that makes me scream.
Not the petty, “Ugh, he’s annoying” kind of hate. No, I mean the “I will end you” kind of hatred, the hatred that’s so deep it comes from their very soul. Simply seeing each other breathe air causes a problem.
The insults that cut too deep, the tension so thick you could slice it with a knife (and honestly, they might try).
Then—oh, then—there’s that one moment. Maybe their eyes meet across the battlefield, guns drawn, but no one shoots. Maybe they get caught in a heated argument?
She throws the first punch, but he catches her wrist and yanks her into him. His grip is tight but not tight enough to hurt. She struggles, pushing against him, but he doesn’t let go.
Then…something shifts and his eyes flicker with something. Hesitation? Realization? Then he lets go.
She stares at him, confused. Why did he let go? She doesn’t speak. Just silence.
Then, he steps forward. Instinctively, she steps back. Another step, then another, until her back hits the wall, and he’s right there, closing the distance, his breath warm against her skin.
And that’s when it happens. That moment when everything changes.
This trope thrives on passion, and let’s be honest: Sometimes, you just want two people to yell at each other until they’re kissing.
The stakes are high, the tension is through the roof, and the inevitable moment when one of them realizes, oh no, I think I am in love. Absolute gold!
My Top 5 Enemies to Lovers Books (Because You’ve Earned It)
After sitting through all my ranting, here’s a reward: my top five enemies-to-lovers books that will give you all the fighting, angst, and painful hatred you crave.
- The Cruel Prince by Holly Black – This book features backstabbing, betrayal, and fae politics.
- These Violent Delights by Chloe Gong – Romeo and Juliet, but with gang wars and actual murder.
- From Blood and Ash by Jennifer L. Armentrout – You can expect secrets, swords, and seething tension. Enough said.
- The Bridge Kingdom by Danielle L. Jensen – A trained assassin marries a king she’s meant to destroy. I love it.
- Vicious by L.J. Shen – If you want enemies-to-lovers with some serious pain (and I mean pain), this is your book.
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My Top 5 Friends to Lovers Books (Because Sometimes We Like to be Loved Softly Too)
If all that chaos made your heart rate skyrocket and you need a wholesome cleanse, here are my top five friends-to-lovers books that will make you believe in love again.
- People We Meet on Vacation by Emily Henry – The ultimate best-friends-to-lovers slow burn that will have you screaming at the pages.
- Love and Other Words by Christina Lauren – Childhood friends, heartbreak, and second chances. Emotional damage? Absolutely.
- The Deal by Elle Kennedy – A hockey player and a tutor? The perfect blend of friendship and romance.
- Emma by Jane Austen – The original friends-to-lovers masterpiece because Mr. Knightley had it bad for Emma from day one. He is what we call a lover boy.
- Before We Were Strangers by Renée Carlino – A love story that spans years, reconnecting two friends who were always meant to be.
Now that I’ve given you my list, read, weep, scream, rinse, and repeat. So enemies to lovers vs. friends to lovers, which is your favorite and why. Leave a comment below.
Until next time, my loves.